The script of the adventures has now come to close…one would expect the final chapter would be simple
- Getup
- Into the car
- Drive to Geneve
- Jump a train
- Get to Paris
Done BUT No…..with the combined effort of DK and the manically mad Swiss milkmaid the story unfolded into an epic saga of disasters, tears, near misses through 3 countries over 12 hours…………………… Departed after 8 a little later than anticipated…wanted to get in Genève by midday..have a bit of free time and jump on the 2.29 TGV to Paris to arrive in time for a shower and out for dinner…… we knew the roads would be busy due to TDF traffic…..
Up into the mountains passed Briancon…lots on the road ~ trucks, cyclist, motor homes, cyclist, buses, cyclist all going up 8% narrow roads with switchback after switchback……wonderful scenery…GPS indicated ETA noon…..the plan is sound and working beautifully…. Time for a quick stop and photo shoot of the area…back in the car and hi ho hi ho off to Genève we go…constantly checking and ratifying GPS with map and back to GPS…….. a couple of sneaky turns through to the E highways and as agreed head in the direction of Torino then take a sneaky left turn into the big tunnel and straight into Genève and touchdown…..just a quick note I am in Europe and I can confirm that it was not me entering the field at the State of Origin last week.
When in Italy the traffic speed picks up…the 130 is interpreted as supersonic and when going through a tunnel with workmen and the advisory speed of 60…then the norm 100. Its amazing to drive through a tunnel 10 kms long at 100+ with a truck approaching at speed from the rear with 10 guys doing a total tunnel rebuild …..the Citilink closes to 10km speed limit when they need to change a lighbulb.
Generally the milkmaid has been an impartial guest with the occasional; turn left, straight, invariably the instructions given just at the required activity moment or when we are fully aware of what to do………now…..no doubt you are guessing what occurred…..well here is the list of what unfolded.. no detailed narrative required but happy to provide if required…its 83 ways to have a total nervous breakdown
- Travelingat130
- GPS Right turn ahead
- Come around curve
- 3 options on righthandside
- GPS silent
- Option1….A small entrance to a tunnel
- Option2….An exit to a small Italian village
- Option3 E7 9.
- GPS silent
- DK silent
- Trucks and cars filling rear vision mirror at 130
- Take the obvious route BIG road E70
- Just as front wheels hit the first 10 meters of E70
- GPS…THE DYSLEXIC SWISS MILKMAID…..
- TAKE FIRST LEFT
- %^$#@&*())
- So Susa here we come
- GPS now reorganises us to Genève via Torino…. A 5 hour drive ETA3.00
- Think she has relatives in Italy
- Stop at Fuel stop
- Kroll exercises his fluent Italian
- Confirm next exit is 30 km
- Exit at Susa
- GPS is silent
- Try to re-enter E70
- Confronted with a sign ~ big red circle and lots of Italian word with attenzione
- Had no choice…plunged down the road
- GPS confirmed we are now on the E70 heading to Genève
- ETA 1.18
- Foot down 130+
- Fuel stop
- Foot down 130+
- ETA 1.18
- Arrived at toll ..wouldn’t accepted CC or cash…
- All the attendants are running from booth to booth
- Took DK’s CC fixed
- Foot down 130+
- ETA 1.22
- Confirmed that we need to travel from Genève airport to Genèvecentral 8 mins
- 4 trains an hour
- Arrived Swiss/French border
- Follow cars
- Large lady with security stepped in front of car….STOP
- Ohhh OOOOO
- 2 min delay…waved through pheeeew
- Foot down 130+
- ETA 1.34 (plus return car hire + 8 mins to Geneva by train)
- Sweep into airport
- Spot car hire returns
- Hand back keys
- Check bill…..not my credit card number!!!!!!!
- Need to go to office in airport!!!
- Problem for another day
- Wait for shuttle to airport 6 minutes
- Time check 1.50 (Train to Paris lease 2.29)
- Arrive Geneva Airport 2.00
- Where is train station…signs??
- Accost Portuguese cleaner with Emille’s French it works…station over there
- Down the stairs need ticket..no CH francs
- Long queue at ticket counter . DK in the queue
- Try machine…first one cash only
- Wait behind hobbit at another time 2.05
- Stick card in, all instructions in French
- Keep pressing buttons
- Two ticket to somewhere pop out
- Tell DK
- Two trains at platform
- Accost Ukraine clearer with Emille’s French is this train going to Genève YES
- DK confirms with fellow traveller OK
- Time 2.08
- Train departs
- Conductor checks tickets………..
- We are in first class need to move…..its an 8 minute trip give me a break …… cost $A7
- Arrive at Geneva train station
- Time 2.17
- TGV platform confirmed
- Done… up.. down……..through customs whoosh
- On the platform 2.22 plenty of time to spare
- DK bought 2nd class seats….
- Had 2 apples, soft banana and half a block of chocolate…for the trip 81.Arrived in Paris
- Taxi to hotel
- The girls were out, forget to leave key at desk
Dinner Bed
FIN